so sad so sexy

Thursday, September 13, 2018


I keep my reality in pictures. Words are not whole when you’re down. Everything is okay but nothing’s good.
It bores me to death. I need to change my meds or therapy.  Not sure which one, probably both. I know I’m monothematic, I really do. But I only have two states - depression and indifference. These are my only states of mind for last 12 years. And of course, I have fun. But the heart stays dry like a raisin. I hate raisins in my cheesecake.
(…)

Agata invited me to a question game.  Go and check her wonderful cooking blog out! Thank you so, so much and here are my answers:

1. What would be your perfect place for holidays?
Norway.

2.  When everything and everyone annoys you…
... I listen to music.

3. Did you see any movie worth watching recently?
I binge watched The Alienist for the second time, does it count?

4. Water - sparkling or still?
#sparkling!

5. What makes you cry of laughter?
Jeff Dunham.

August in pictures.

Friday, September 7, 2018


Caitylis

For me it's autumn already. When August finished I started to dig pumpkin spice and maple syrup. No matter what they say - I've been waiting for it whole summer. I need to start getting film roll supplies to have both September and October photographed all over. Beware, I'm on autumnal frenzy.

An old foe.

Monday, August 20, 2018


How do you deal with grief? When it surprises you out of nowhere, on the happiest day or the most annoying one. When you embrace a chilly breeze of the sea and it hits you straight in the head. You dealt with it before, you thought that nothing is going to hurt you anymore. And then this old foe comes back for a party. You may be strong, old friend but I’m not going to play with you any day longer. 
It’s just me, sand and my Baltic Sea.

Her.

Saturday, August 11, 2018


Some of you have already seen these photos few years ago. But I decided to refresh them and edit one more time. It was 2015 as I read in my library.

I met her on my first day in photography school when she held a camera for the first time in her professional life. She inspired me, she decided to be a friend. She was eager to learn and explore art. We got close very fast, spent most of our days talking and taking pictures. Now she's much better than me, she's not an artist, she's THE artist. Her successes make me proud every time. And I miss her very much.

From Friday to Friday.

Wednesday, August 8, 2018


I isolate a lot. Derealization makes me float in the clouds in complete silence. I binge watch Girls, eat packed noodles and count days from Friday to Friday. Summertime sadness? You know what helps? Matrix soundtrack. Trust me.

Lughnasadh

Thursday, August 2, 2018


No matter what culture you come from - we all have the same traditions. One of the most joyful times, time of giving thanks for all the harvest and welfare. Harvest festival - Lughnasadh or Lammas. A very interesting day, the best when shared with your favorite people over some delicious food made of harvested goods. Or just a pizza, flour is a crop, duh. AND - every chance to meet and have food is perfect. Here are some still life shots - and a doggie - you seemed to like the last one!

Life moments and cityscapes... on film.

Thursday, July 26, 2018


Long time no see! I've been really busy getting into my new job and trying to tape myself with tape and glue. I'm lost in photography cause the real life scares me. I'm still trying to fix my own mistakes.